THE NEXT CHAPTER IN HOMEBODY-ING

Well, America, it’s 2021. Thus ends the longest-shortest year of our collective lives. If you had told me when I started all of *gestures around vaguely* this that we would all be embracing a mandated homebody lifestyle in 2020, I surely wouldn’t have believed you. 

This past year, I’ve watched folks on the socials baking bread, making beautiful dinners and completing long-standing DIY projects. And yet, even with endless time on our hands and a will to join the fun, I found it hard to participate in a public way. It didn’t feel right to be posting about what I deemed as frivaility when there was so much hurt happening in the world. A pandemic, continued racial injustice and a tumultuous election certainly held my bandwidth. Like you, I was learning, protesting, donating to charities, volunteering and doom-scolling like it was my full-time job. How could I continue to post on my little blog when there was such imperative work to be done?

Recently, I’ve been reflecting on why I even started this journey. Without a strong “why” what is there to even keep you motivated? The reason ended up being pretty simple. It’s the same reason why I’ve so enjoyed looking at all of your homemade baked goods, holiday decor and sourdough loaves. It brings comfort.

When it comes to the art of the home, I don’t know it all and I certainly don’t try to. Simply, I love to make things nice. Rooms, bookshelves, holidays, gatherings, quiet dinners at home, the pantry, the medicine cabinet - I think making them nice means something. Having 2020 to slow down and look around affirmed how important “home” and seemingly trivial things can be. For me, Dustin and Horton are home. I want the structure around us to match how they make me feel. Comfortable, secure, nice - there’s that word again.  

We’ve been incredibly lucky this year. We are both healthy and employed. Anything else we’ve managed to pull off in this dumpster fire is just icing on the cake.

As I write this, I’m sitting in a make-shift den that Dustin and I have set up in my childhood bedroom. We’ve been bunking with my parents since September as we prepare for our next big adventure in homebody-ing. At the end of the month, we’ll start a new chapter when we close on our first home in Connecticut. We’re excited to take you along for the ride while we figure out home-ownership, renovations and adjusting to suburban life. Hopefully it will bring you a small escape from whatever you’re going through with humor and little comfort. And yes, I’ll continue my never ending mission for nice.

Good for the Body: Upside-Down Blueberry Cobbler

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It’s easy. It’s no-bake. It’s Paleo. It’s vaguely patriotic.

If you’re looking for a crowd pleaser, look somewhere else because it’s quarantine and this recipe has only been tested on my husband. If you’re look for something that is stupid easy and delicious, your instagram algorithm has blessed you. Look no further. Let’s get into it, shall we?

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Upside-Down Blueberry Cobbler

Recipe yields one 4” ramekin

Ingredients

Crust

• 3 tbsp almond flour

• 1 tbsp melted coconut oil

• 1 tsp honey

• 1/4 tsp cinnamon

• 1/4 tsp water

Filling

• 1 cup fresh blueberries

• 1 tbsp maple syrup

• 1 tbsp water

Topping

• We use this recipe!

Here’s how you do it

1. In your ramekin, mix the almond flour and cinnamon. Stir in wet ingredients until the mixture is Carlos Santana smooth.

2. Scrape the “crust mixture” down the sides of the ramekin and flatten at the bottom. Give her a time out to chill in the fridge for at least 30 minutes.

3. Get those blueberries out and wash the nasty pesticides and coronavirus off of them.

4. In a small saucepan, bring the blueberries, maple syrup and water to a boil. Reduce to a simmer for 10 minutes until she gets thic. Let that cool until room temperature.

5. Spoon the blueberry compote into the ramekin and move that tasty treat back to the fridge for another 30 minutes.

6. Before serving, garnish the cobbler with whatever brings you the most bliss. I piped some whipped cream and cut a strawberry fan because I learned how to do that watching the Kids Baking Championship. Superfluous blueberry garnish added for patriotic warm fuzzies.

7. Enjoy

Category is: The Ikea Upcycle

We have had a serious monkey on our back for the last few years. It was screaming “GET A NEW COUCH.” When we moved in together, DB had a Karlstad Sofa he brought along. Neither of us were crazy about it, but there wasn’t anything wrong with the damn thing, so we couldn’t get rid of it. It was a nice neutral grey, so for two guys who were just starting to merge styles, it was a perfect piece. For those who aren’t intimately familiar with the IKEA catalogue, here’s an IKEA Karlstad Sofa:

Stunning photo courtesy of www.ikea.com

The Upcycle Evolution of this sofa was a slow burn. I’m not sure what you see when you look at the above picture, but all I can see are those LEGS. I have a visceral reaction to them. I wish them harm. They are just so blocky. Why? Why, Ikea? Why-kea? These were the first things to go. In their stead, I found mid-century replacement legs on Etsy from a shop that has sadly shuttered. What a difference they made though!

Photo Credit: @ruthiedarling for Boro Magazine

The legs automatically make the couch feel so much more expensive. And really. Isn’t that all that matters? But seriously, this tiny change held us over for two and a half years. Not only did it give us that mid-century look we so love, it also gave the couch some needed height because we’re aging and our knees can no longer afford a low couch.

Nearly three years later, we have some well-earned ware on poor Karlstad. We’re talking years of parties, pooches rubbing their stank in the cushions, and lots of wine spills. Assessing the situation that - especially with two aging pups and the fact that it was a damn near miracle we could even fit this couch through our very narrow hallway in our fourth floor walk up - we should probably wait, again, to get our dream couch until conditions improve. AKA when we move out of this matchbox. Still desperate for a change, we turned to Comfort Works! Comfort Works specializes in a wide variety of fashionable slip covers for Ikea furniture, targeting people just like us! Folks who have a piece of furniture that is still completely functional but needs Botox - I mean a change.

We decided to go dark because wine stains and chose the Kiko Navy. DB decided to be FEARLESS and also opt for the Comfort Works Tufting Kit. This made me nervous because measuring mystifies me, but he was right. Not only did it give our couch a whole new feel, but it also gave our couch cushions some of their structure back after years of binge watching HGTV. Comfort Works makes the whole reskinning process fool proof. Now, I didn’t get any pics of us changing out the slip cover because it was definitely an all hands on deck situation and we haven’t taught Horton how to us the camera yet, but take a look at some pics of the tufting process below!

Honestly, if you’re not ready to say goodbye to that Ikea sofa because of dem good bones, look no further. Comfort Works delivers and even their customer service is on point! But don’t take our word for it - take a look at our model dog and the finished product. Pictures usually speak for themselves, but these ones can’t come to the phone right now - THEY’RE GAGGED!

Ready for his close-up

Honestly, couldn’t get a pic of the couch without him on it.

Three Thanksgiving Favorites, One Ball

I have always been that person at dinner. My peas end up in my mashed potatoes. My carrots end up in my green beans, my cranberry sauce ends up in my stuffing and my turkey ends up in the garbage disposal.

Ground turkey can be tough - literally. It’s hard to keep all that meat moist. It can end up v dense. It can be bland. Around this time last year, DB was trying to eat less red meat and more lean poultry and I was having approximately none of it. One night for dinner, he was hell-bent on making a Turkey meatball to replace his truly other-worldly beef meatballs (a recipe for another time) and it just so happened that we had a box of Stove Top in the cabinet from our friend’s Thanksgiving Eve Party. We usually make our own stuffing, but needed a more cost effective base for when we finally conquered making bite-sized appetizer Stuffing Balls - are you sensing a theme? Category is : BALLS, BALLS, BALLS ACROSS THE BOARD!

Anyway, with a stroke of genius; instead of using breadcrumbs or almond flour, which we use when we’re doing a Paleo diet, DB decided to throw in the Stove Top. It was a GAME CHANGER. It took a few trial runs, but we have finally got the recipe down to a science! Without further ado, take a look at our recipe below! We hope you enjoy them as much as we do. They’re simple, delicious, and SUPER BAD FOR YOU. xoxo.

Not pictured, Turkey that is in the fridge, because Salmonella

WHAT YOU’LL NEED:

• 1 pound ground turkey

• (1) 6oz box of Stove Top (legit any style will do as long as it’s a carb)

• 1 small white onion

• 1 jumbo egg

• 1 tablespoon extra virgin olive oil

• 3 teaspoons cranberry sauce (in mix)

WHAT YA GONNA DO:

1. Pre-heat that oven to 350.

2. Chop that onion into fairly small pieces and in a skillet of your choosing, saute in that EVOO until translucent. After it’s looking good, turn off the heat and set aside to cool.

3. In a mixing bowl that can fit a pound of MEAT and a bunch of bread, open that turkey and throw her in.

4. To the turkey, add in that package of stuffing, cranberry sauce, egg and onions. You guessed it - mix. it. up.

5. Start rolling! The balls should be no larger than a silver dollar.

6. Space evenly on a baking sheet and bake for 20-30 minutes.

7. Remove. Dress with cranberry sauce. Enjoy with other basic autumnal sides. We prefer a sweet potato hash, which you’ll learn how to make…soon.

Rollin’ with the homies

Raw balls. It’s a gay blog. For everyone.

Delicious, decadent deeply festive

Just a couple of Homebodies

Hey there and welcome to the Homo Homebodies Blog! My name is Troy. I’ve lived in New York now for seven years - which is insane to think about! I never imagined I would be here this long! About four years ago I met DB at a party and when neither of us were willing to leave the general vicinity of a vat of margaritas, we knew it was meant to be. Three years later, almost to the day, we were married on Cinco de Mayo!

DB and I are definitely what you would classify as nesters. New York is hard. The commuting, the cost, the mile walk to the subway just to find that it isn’t running - there are no punches pulled. But, this is where we find ourselves building a life. It isn’t easy, but we love it - especially our neighborhood of Astoria. It’s home! And since we’re here for the foreseeable future, GD-it we’re going to make this an oasis!

What to expect? I love working with my hands. Crafting, painting, arranging flowers, general DIY and lots of decor. The best idea I can give you is that I want to Make Martha Stewart proud. That’s all my gay heart wants. And World Peace.

Anyway - Thanks for coming along for the ride, lets see where this takes us!

Two guys, two dogs! Aaron Spagnolo Photography

Our Place shot by @ruthiedarling for Boro Magazine